Gyan round

This is a very beautiful piece...a. must read

Keep The Faith - Transform The FearBy Lorraine Cohen

To what extent does fear rule your life? In my coaching practice, fear
often emerges when clients envision change and take steps to bring
those changes into reality. Familiarity fosters comfort and safety;
therefore, growth may be perceived as frightening. Recognizing some of the
subtleties of fear takes a bit of detective work.

Forms of fear include: procrastination, the need to be in control,
anger (which can be a cover for other emotions such as helplessness or
powerlessness), isolation, induced illness, rationalizing, and blaming.
Getting under the reaction unveils the fear.

One of my coaching clients was feeling stuck and overwhelmed. He
continually came to a point in his growth and went no farther. He felt a
duality inside. One part of him yearned to take a leap, another part
convinced him to stop—his life was pretty good, right? At the root of his
inertia was fear. He could stay in his fear, or take his life to the next
level. He made the choice to work through his fear. His first point of
resistance to change was his fear of commitment and structure. For him,
this meant being trapped. A pivotal shift occurred when he redefined
his perception of commitment and structure.

In our talks, he discovered he had already successfully committed to
his lifestyle (structure) of avoidance. This clarity created a shift.
Something he had wanted to do for years was to offer monthly talks to his
clients. Committing to schedule the talks within a specific time frame
was his first step. One month later, he presented his talk to a highly
receptive audience. By giving himself choice, focusing on the present,
and taking a risk in fear, he began to dismantle his fears.

I have found these to be successful practices to help transform fear:

Practice daily gratitude - Recognizing your daily blessings, both big
and small, evokes peace and trust. Expressing gratitude generates joyful
thoughts and feelings. Put your attention on the glass half full rather
than the glass half empty. I recommend writing in a daily gratitude
journal. Taking time to list gifts and blessings uplifts the spirit.
Challenge yourself to transform negativity by finding gratitude in the most
difficult situations. And, throughout the day, purposefully acknowledge
what you are grateful for, silently or to others. Share the joy.

Be in faith - Put your trust in your spiritual beliefs, Your own
personal history is a reflection of the love and gifts you recognize as
coming from the Divine. At times of doubt and fear, trust your faith and
inner wisdom for clarity and perspective. Gratitude, meditation, prayers,
asking the Universe for love, support, and guidance—whatever connects
you with Spirit is a source of comfort and strength. In trust, there is
no fear.

Be in the present - In his ground-breaking book, The Power of Now,
Eckhart Tolle advocates being in the moment, in the now. He stresses the
power the mind has in creating perceived reality. Our minds have the
ability to imagine the worst (intensifying fear) instead of expecting the
best. He says, "the more identified you are with your thinking, your
likes and dislikes, judgments, and interpretations, the stronger the
emotional energy charge will be, whether you are aware of it or not." He
believes, "unease, anxiety, tension, stress, worry—all forms of fear are
caused by too much future and not enough presence." Disengaging from
thoughts and reactions (stimulated by thought) by becoming the observer,
will de-energize mind activity. Being in the present connects us to the
Divine.

Practice extreme self-care - I use extreme because taking the best care
of YOU is serious! When needs are not being met, negative thoughts and
reactions intensify. Does your life flow when you are neglecting
yourself? Being positively selfish and putting yourself first gives you the
vitality and desire to be fully there for those you love—by choice, not
obligation. Here are some tips: begin a regime of daily nurturing
habits, say "no" when needed, create personal time for you to do the things
you love, set boundaries, and speak up! Embracing self-love teaches
others how to love and respect you and attract people who will value
appreciate who you are.

Be in integrity - Are you living a value-based life and "walking your
talk?" When you live your life by being true to "who you are," fear is
replaced by peace and serenity. When you are in integrity, fewer
problems are experienced, consistent feelings of peace and well-being prevail,
and reactions to people and situations diminish. What are you
accepting, avoiding, rationalizing or tolerating that is compromising your
integrity?

Build a strong, positive, nurturing community - Be discerning. Seek out
quality people who will love you unconditionally. The value of having
the support of a loving community is priceless, especially during times
of personal pain and challenge.

Be a risk-taker, MOVE! - Taking appropriate, empowered action "in fear"
dismantles the illusion of paralysis and the power of fear. Where have
you hesitated or avoided taking action? What excuses have you told
yourself for remaining stationary? What holds you back? When needed, get
help from your community or a skilled professional. Hire a coach. Draw on
your personal strengths, gifts, talents and skills for courage and
focus. Your life is a reflection of personal successes in the face of fear.
Gain perspective, clarity and MOVE! Take action, one step at a time.

Several years ago, one of my clients shared this inspirational poem.

"When we come to the edge of all the light we have

And must take a step into the darkness of the Unknown

We must believe one of two things:

Either we will find something firm to stand on

Or, we will be taught to fly"

~ Rich Bach, Jonathon Livingston Seagull

Cycle of Life

Once we come to this world, we learn to lead life as taught by our elders. From the time we learn to crawl, understand the ways of life, learn from our experiences and mistakes to the time we give up the urge to live, we pass through a huge maze of people and incidents. Many people we meet imbibe into us some or the other quality of theirs. We look up, look down or just look even with all these people, a few who become acquaintance, a few who are just there, a few whose presence we cannot stand, a few who become an integral part of our lives...our friends. Through whom we share our wins, our losses, our triumphs, everything that can be thought off.

One fine day, like all good things have to come to an end, God calls this person to visit him, and there is this big bad void in life. Then you realize life is so short.

Its terrible loosing your loved ones, most terrible to loose your parents. Its equally miserable to loose your friends, because then you realise your number is not far off...Sooner or later, death will knock on your door step.

Today, our family lost a good friend, a man, whose life was cut short by deadly disease. Our entire family mourns the loss of this person...May his soul rest in peace!

Sahir Ludhiyanvi at his best

Koun Kehta Hai Mohabbat Ki Zubaan Hoti Hai
Yeh Haqeeqat Tou Nigaahoun Se Bayaan Hoti Hai

Woh Na Aayien Tou Sataati Hai Khalish Si Dil Ko
Woh Jo Aayien Tou Khalish Aur Jawaan Hoti Hai

Rooh Ko Shaad Karey, Dil Ko Jo Pur-Noor Karey
Har Nazaarey Mein Yeh Tanweer Kahaan Hoti Hai

Zindagi Ek Sulagti Si Chitta Hai Sahir
Shoola Banti Hai Na Yeh Bujh Kay Dhuyaan Hoti Hai

A trip down memory lane

05-05-05, my previous company celebrated its 25 year of existance. A special party was organised to celebrate this remarkable success.

I was also a part of the celebration, and from the minute i walked in to now, am filled with nostalgia. I met many of the old faces with whom i worked and lot many new faces...who surprisingly knew me, probably for all my notorious activities ;).

The senior most member of the organisation and me were book buffs, he used to borrow books from me, and he came searching for me and said that his reading habits have dwindled...;) and should i tell if u was flattered or not?

After all the hi, how are u? long time no see...oh god, u have put on weight...man u have just not changed, Goodness its such fun to be seeing all old faces etc etc...time to hit the food and drinks as per interest...after a good dinner, i went to dump my plate and turned around to see a man standing there with folded hands, for a min i didnot recognise him, then it hit me, he was the watchman of the building. He would take care of my bike, when i left it at office over the weekend...monday morning, i would find my bike spic and span. He would tell me his stories of how his kids dont study etc and cry too at times. As always i would give him some gyan and tell him to have faith in God and himself.

It was a strange feel that hit me last night and am yet to figure what's that.

New Age shayari

Read this on one of the mail list...must laud the Shayar :)

Ab aae ho to phir vohi takraar na karnaa
Phir "zikr-e-siyasat" ka gunah gaar na karnaa

"Cigarette" na nikaalo ke fizaaoN maiN hai khushboo
Barbaad mere phooloN ki mehkaar na karnaa

Naraz na hona meri darkhavast pe hargiz
"Coffee" ke liye aaj to israar na karna

Aao zara saRkoN pe tehl laiN mere saathi
Sardi to hai be shak ,magar,inkaar na karnaa

Yeh raag yeh sangeet mujhe dete haiN lori
Gar sone lagooN to mujhe baidaar na karnaa

khud hi mujhe ehsaas hai apni ghalati kaa
tum apni shikaayat se sharamsaar na karnaa

Daikho mujhe dar lagta hai gussey se tumhare
Tum mujh se khafa ho bhi to izhaar na karnaa

Jate ho to phir "car " ko aahista chalaanaa
Phir tez Khuda ke liye, raftaar na karnaa

So where were we???

Last week, at about 6:00 when the sun was just about the rise, and the morning turning to be bright and beautiful day, a splendid idea hit my empty head. Why not change my blog template?? Before laziness could take over me, i got onto the job...as i was doing the required changes, i started noting the trip to the great Friendship Concert, as you read and saw, i never completed it...so much for warding off laziness.

Here i start again..

Saturday 5th March evening will be a always alive event in my memory. The two soulful voices re-created their magic which has held people in awe from god knows how many years. Ghulam Ali started with a raag (pardon my sense of musical knowledge), which he said is dedicated to his Guru Bade Ghulam Ali Saheb, he went on to sing a Thumari and then his well known ghazals, Awargi, Hangama hai kyoun Barpa and the most famous amongst Indians Chupke Chupke...the man has a unique style of singing...the way he alters i am sure no one else can do it.

He gave way to the other maestro, who was greeted with cheers, claps the desi way (i hope u understand what i mean to say)...he had the crowd going crazy when he started with a medley fo songs featuring Chand (started with "Phool bhi dekha...Chand bhi dekha..." and closed with "Kal chaudviyen ki raat thi..").

The evening grew all the more better with the melodious, melonchanic voices treating the listeners to all theirs favourites....It's like you never want it to come to an end...just go on and on. On Public demand he ended the show with a punjabi number.

At the end of it, all of us moved away with the voices booming in our minds, even to this day i can feel it in me...wish these shows happen on a very regular frequency.

Just in case one of the organiser's stumble on my blog, maybe you could have made a extremely memorable show if the arragnements were a little better. The sound system was bad, till the last song, Jagjit Singh was seen asking for better sound quality.

Cribs apart, it was awesome. I was told this weekend Manna Dey performs in Chowdiah's, am gonna miss this one..:(

A Magical Evening

On Saturday i was at the Friendship Concert, by Ghulam Ali and Jagjit Singh. The setting was awesome, cool summer breeze coupled with the lovely ghazals of these legends and the crowd asking for more.

V-day...how what why?

On V-Day, we had a contest at office, which asked people to write a short essay on how they celebrate V-day, basically narrate their emotions. The writer in me was in no mood to sit quite, this is what i came up with, some crap is what i would call it..

Valentine’s Day and me, how do i celebrate?

Valentine’s Day is a day when all and sundry express their profound love to that one person, who is the closest to the heart. Love, affection, display of emotion run high on this day, profoundly displayed by gifting, flowers, candies, chocolates, teddies etc etc.

From my teenage days I have seen, heard and been through this whole cycle of people around me preparing for Valentine’s Day and living through the day, as though it is never going to occur again. Lets start from the basics….What according to me is Love?

Love is an emotion that is very enticing, luring and at the same time stranger than fiction. It’s that one strong emotion, which is available in abundance with a human being. God has gifted living beings with all kinds of emotions, love being the strongest and in the greatest of abundance. Love also brings with it, pain, through which we live every single day. It’s the perfect blend of Agony and Ecstasy. As they say “you have to go through darkness of the night to appreciate the sight of a beautiful sunrise”. Such is the relationship of love and pain.

I personally don’t feel that you need a day to profess your love, everyday through your thoughts, actions and deeds you show your loved ones, your family, friends all those who are close to you how much you care. You live for them; you make every attempt to keep that sadness miles away from their eyes and face.

For me, everyday is a valentine’s day, and I may not say it with flowers, candies, chocolates, and mushy cards. I have my way to do things in life, different,
discrete and absolutely unique. People who know me will not be surprised if I celebrate April 1st as Valentine’s Day. It’s all in the feeling, rather than
following the calendar blindly.

The big question unanswered yet, how do I celebrate? A million ways maybe, something, which will bring smile, happiness, and radiance to the person for whom, I take the trouble. Cook a good meal; because once the tummy is full, with absolutely yummy food, the mind is at rest. Any which way, the road to a man’s heart is through his stomach. Put on the best smile of mine, and make the entire world look dull ;) and thank God for the beautiful moments of life, that I have got to spend.

My entire day goes in appreciating life, the beauty around me and saying what a life I have led. God is surely Great, for having sent us in this beautiful world and you don’t need a valentine Day to tell the Lord how much you love him for having sent you to this world.

A group of students once asked their Professor, Which was his most romantic moment? A typical kiddish question you would say. The Prof replied, “when I was flying for the first time, all alone, and when the air craft got into the clouds, that’s when I felt most romantic, I felt closest to God.”

Still keeping in the tradition, here is something, which I read about Valentine’s Day and it makes lot of sense to chronic bachelors/spinsters:

Valentine's Day, the blood red roses
Valentine's Day, the sickening chocolate cherry hearts
Valentine's Day, the day the bar is lowered and
poems are written, not out of affection but obligation

flowers are bought for the sole purpose of keeping
your significance as a "significant other"
making sure you don't fall behind the others of others

no matter what you've done so far
because on this mid-February day all the scores are
back to zero
and you are again just one misstep from banishment.
Isn't that how everything has worked,
the last three, four, five years?
"Don't mess up Valentine's Day, or you might not get a
second chance"?

These are some words, which don’t work on people like me, for donkey’s years I have seen this day pass by me. Always praying for the loved ones, those who are close to my heart and living life with greater zeal with them around. Till the “significant” other makes a grand entry into my life.

For the rest of my life…I shall remain 18 till I die
:)

Out of the world

After a long time, read a couplet which is absolutely marvellous

"Tassavur main chale aate, tumhara kya bigar jata
Tumhara parda rah jata, hummain deedar ho jate."

Brooding

How many times have you faced questions like?

What the hell am I doing with myself?
Am I taking the right path?
Should I be planning for my future...or lets take it when it comes?

Etcetc...am sure all of us go through these rounds of questions, from the time we have gathered out sense and have had the caliber of taking decisions and this process will go on till we loose our breath. We go through various crests, troughs, tides, highs, lows and what not of life, where each experience is marvelous, but once out of it, we crib, not appreciating what's the lesson loved of it.

Well, am I sounding like one of the new age guru's who teach lots of funda....phewww.....no no no...Just that, my head is as always filled with question and the wanderer in me says...Chakde...Live life King (Queen) Size and just chillll.

Strange are the ways of the world...true?
U bet it is....me is the biggest stranger of them all :)))

State of Affairs

This is a famous ghazal, and i also found its english translation (for the under-privilged ;))


mili hawaon mein udne ki woh saza yaaro
ke main zameen ke rishton se kat gaya yaaro

[The price that I paid for flying in the air is that
I got cut off from all the earthly relationships]

2. woh bekhayal musafir main rasta yaaro
kahan tha bas mein mere usko rokna yaaro

[He was the carefree/careless/thoughtless traveller, and I the road
Where was it in my capacity to stop him]

3. mere kalam pe zamane ki gard aisi thi
ke apne baare mein kuch bhi na likh saka yaaro

[My pen was filled with all the world's dirt, such that
I could not write anything about myself at all]

4. tamaam sheher hi jiski talaash mein ghum tha
main uske ghar ka pata kisse poochta yaaro

[The person for whom the whole city was busy searching
To whom could I ask his home address]

Kya?

Zindagi ki dhadkano mein jaan kahin nahin hai
In parchaiyeeon ke bazaar mein insan kahin nahin hai

Khud se dokha khaye aur kab tak jeete rahe
Apne garebaan mein bhi to imaan kahin nahin hai

Na ranj ka rishta na tagaful-e-shikwa na tana-e-gayar
Khuda kya ab to qaatil bhi meherbaan kahin nahin hai

Possibility

Norman Vincent Peale says

"Become a Possibilitarian. No matter how dark things seem to be or actually are, raise your sights and see the possibilities - always see them, for they are always there"

Now how many times do i see the possibility of me becoming a full time blogger again and visit blogs of my pals?

Possibility ratio? 80/20?...u never know ;)

Something heavy

Something absolutely heavy...

Ghalib says,

na thaa kuchh to Khudaa thaa, kuchh na hotaa to Khudaa hotaa
Duboyaa mujh ko hone ne, na hotaa mein to kyaa hotaa

huaa jab Ghum se yuun behis to Ghum kyaa sar ke katta ne kaa
na hotaa gar judaa tan se, to zaanon par dharaa hotaa

[behis=shocked/stunned, zaanon=thigh]

huii muddat ke 'Ghalib' mar gayaa par yaad aataa hai
wo har ek baat pe keh naa ke yun hotaa to kyaa hotaa

[muddat=duration/period ]

On the lighter side

har sham dafan hote hain kuch armaan
har subah ummeedon ki fasal khadi hoti hai.
har kabr pe ugta hai koi nanha sa paudha
har deewar me koi khidki khuli hoti hai.

Easy and Difficult

My wish for all of you, May ur difficulties cease and life become easy and smooth...Have a wonderful year!

Easy is to get a place is someone's address book.
Difficult is to get a place in someone's heart.

Easy is to judge the mistakes of others
Difficult is to recognize our own mistakes

Easy is to talk without thinking
Difficult is to refrain the tongue

Easy is to hurt someone who loves us.
Difficult is to heal the wound...

Easy is to forgive others
Difficult is to ask for forgiveness

Easy is to set rules.
Difficult is to follow them...

Easy is to dream every night.
Difficult is to fight for a dream...

Easy is to show victory.
Difficult is to assume defeat with dignity...

Easy is to admire a full moon.
Difficult to see the other side...

Easy is to stumble with a stone.
Difficult is to get up...

Easy is to enjoy life every day.
Difficult to give its real value...

Easy is to promise something to someone.
Difficult is to fulfill that promise...

Easy is to say we love.
Difficult is to show it every day...

Easy is to criticize others.
Difficult is to improve oneself...

Easy is to make mistakes.
Difficult is to learn from them...

Easy is to weep for a lost love.
Difficult is to take care of it so not to lose it.

Easy is to think about improving.
Difficult is to stop thinking it and put it into action...

Easy is to think bad of others
Difficult is to give them the benefit of the doubt...

Easy is to receive
Difficult is to give

Easy to read this
Difficult to follow

Easy is keep the friendship with words
Difficult is to keep it with meanings.

On a new orbit

As i start on a new orbit today, i am heavily inspired by these lines

"The test of a successful person is not an ability to eliminate all problems before they arise,
But to meet and work out difficulties when they do arise .
We must be willing to make an intelligent compromise with perfection ,
Lest we wait forever before taking action... ! ! !"

Memory

This quote was written keeping me in mind :))

The advantage of a bad memory is that one enjoys several times the same good things for the first time.
- Friedrich Nietzsche

Thanks Madhu for this.

A bundle of emotions

Am absolutely overwhelmed...i mean, i never knew so many people would b stopping by my blog after my "Classic Come back"...geee...Thanks pals...u guys made my day. I promise to be more regular...and its a real promise...unlike the political ones. ;)

Was at a religious talk last evening, where the speaker, Dr. Israr Ahmed said, personal conviction is what makes up for your belief in your faith. I believe this "Personal Conviction" holds good for every aspect of life? It was a evening well spent, and i hope to be there this evening as well.

Let me just remind you, my car celebrates it first birthday today (Happy birthday to my car)...and should i again reiterate that am in love with the little thing? And let me tell u, gifts are expected, in cash and not kind.....mean me...u bet i am ;)

Don't Look Back

It has been more than two months that i even saw my blog. Now should i be booked for "Negligence of my good old blog"...;)

i hope to get back to this wonderful land...till my creative juices begin to flow, herez something interesting...


Don't Look Back

As you travel through life there are always those times when decisions just have to be made, when the choices are hard and solutions seem scarce and the rain seems to soak your parade! There are some situations where all you can do is to simply let go and move on, gather courage together and choose a direction that carries you toward a new dawn. So pack up your troubles and take a step forward. The process of change can be tough. But think about all the excitement ahead, if you can be stalwart enough!

There could be adventures you never imagined just waiting around the next bend and wishes and dreams just about to come true in ways you can't yet comprehend!

Perhaps you'll find friendships that spring from new interests, as you challenge your status quo and learn there are so many options in life, and so many ways you can grow! Perhaps you'll go places you never expected and see things that you've never seen, or travel to fabulous, faraway worlds and wonderful spots in between! Perhaps you'll find warmth, affection and caring, a "somebody special" who's there to help you stay centered and listen with interest to stories and feelings you share. Perhaps you'll find comfort in knowing your friends are supportive of all that you do and believe that whatever decisions you make, they'll be the right choices for you!

So keep putting one foot in front of the other and taking your life day by day. There's a brighter tomorrow that's just down the road. Don't look back, you're not going that way!

Heartfelt thanks

Poem, Moment of silence, wishes and a cake ...wow what a way to celebrate turning 3. Thanks one and all for the wishes. Do i also request you to please include me too in the moment of silence...my soul needs rest very badly.

And yes blog turned three and not completed 3 years :)))...and i remember the good old days when i used to make a big long post everyday...these days...well lets talk about brighter things in life :))

Thanks everyone...my belief that i should keep blogging has got a boost again...:)


Khush >> Thanks for the cake, when is it reaching me? Are you going to pack some Australian Cookies too ;)...